A Random Observation About Japanese Tourists

Let me get something straight before you read this. Those of you who know me, know that I am vehemently opposed to discrimination, stereotypes and just prejudice in general. Sometimes, though, I am forced to set aside my morals for an observation regarding certain groups of people. That being said; enjoy...

Working where I do, I tend to see groups of tourists on a regular basis. However, the Japanese tourists tend to stand out because of the large, gelatinous masses that they travel in. Apparently, Japanese fancy themselves as sperm. How do I know this you're asking? Because, through a set of slanty eyes, I, apparently, resemble the last ovum on the planet Earth (for those of you who've had the distinct displeasure of sitting through health class, you know where this is going). For some reason every single one of them deems it necessary to bump or otherwise glance off of me as I'm trying to pass, as if I was a baby-wielding, tight-faced, surgical mask wearing, no pigment having Jacko doing the moon walk through downtown Tokyo covered in honey and 3 million Yen.

Update 11/1/07
Had to include a comment by Andrew when I told him that I was writing about Asian tourists:
"motherfucker I live in Washington DC, i am an expert on the japanese
tourist. i honestly have to say they're ten times better than the
tourists from the midwest and the south. the japanese are organized
and get shuffled on and off the buses like efficient yellowish cattle
by their tour guides. those from the red states trudge along at a
snail's pace, biding time until their next feeding at the transfat
trough."

All I'm saying is...get outta my way. I just want to go and be bored to tears at my job!

Mounds VS Almond Joy

First, I must give a little background for those of you who aren't familiar with either of these pieces of crap. A Mounds is a wad of dried, congealed conconut surrounded by chocolate. A Almond Joy is a Mounds with a random almond sitting on top of it. Now, I'm not sure what culinary genius thought of either of these, but they should be slowly executed for poluting the candybar gene pool.
Onto the naming convention. Why would you call a candybar that is all coconut a Mounds, which I actually like as a name, and call a candy bar with all coconut and ONE almond, an Almond Joy? Shouldn't it be a Coconut Joy? On the rapper, the "o" in Joy is actually a picture of a half coconut. Furthermore, there is a picture of two almonds on the rapper. Isn't that false advertising? Imagine you didn't have a firm grasp of the English language and you were going to choose a candy bar based on the pictures. The Almond Joy would be a delicious choice given those criteria. But, when you bit into it you'd be thinking "what the fuck is this disgusting piece of rat shit I have just insulted my mouth with?"

In conclusion (notice the thesis format), both of these crap cakes suck! We, the consumer, are the real loser here. It's a shame that these horribly named pieces of junk are staring at us when were trying to decide on something delicious to pollute our bodies with!

Discuss amongst yourselves!

Welcome

This being my first post, I feel I should welcome everyone in my own special way. Basically, I'm not welcoming anyone at all, just letting you all know that in this small universe that is my blog, none of your opinions count for shit. As a matter of fact, I'm telling you that you don't have an opinion; about anything that I say, of course, unless you happen to have the exact same opinion that I have. I'm taking the white-upper class approach to this thing from the get-go. I want nothing but homogenization from this. Basically, I want nothing but people with opinions just like mine. Think about it. When you're rich and white, you have the luxury of surrounding yourself with people that have the same views, lifestyles and backgrounds as yourself. This gives you the benefit of isolating yourself from others views, opinions and general cultural norms learned by interacting with people from different socio-economic backgrounds.
Disclaimer: this welcome message is not meant to offend rich or white people. It's just a not-so-random observation.

WELCOME!